A Brick Wall
by wordonthestreet2006
Summary: HUtch is left feeling confused when he and Starsky become lovers.


_After many requests I finally came up with a little Slash story._

A Brick Wall

Hutch awoke to feel Starsky's breath on the back of his neck. Soon that breath was replaced by the gentlest kisses, making a trail down his spine, stopping just short of his shoulder blades. He felt Starsky's arm wrap over him and still with his back to Starsky he tried to remain still. A brick wall, a brick wall, he chanted in his head. He was determined not to respond, to ensure that his penis remained limp.  
He felt Starsky tweaking at his nipples "Hutch" he whispered, "Hutch you awake?" Hutch didn't respond. Starsky resumed kissing Hutch's back, whilst his hand roamed down Hutch's stomach. Starsky made small circles around Hutch's naval. His hand roamed further until his fingers entwined the soft, blond pubic hairs surrounding Hutch's genitals. _A brick wall, a brick wall._ Hutch repeated the mantra silently, praying that his dick wouldn't give rise to Starsky's touch.  
Starsky groped for Hutch's balls. He began to mould them, caress them. "Hutch, come on babe, you wanna fool around?" Hutch didn't't respond. A brick wall, a brick wall. The bloody brick wall was threatening to fail him as Starsky's caresses became more urgent. He took Hutch's cock into his hand and began to pull on it. Up and down, up and down and yet still it remained limp.  
Starsky withdrew his hand. He rolled onto his back, so that he was no longer making any body contact with Hutch. He stared at the ceiling. "Is something wrong Babe?" he whispered, concerned, "Hutch, you awake?" Hutch kept his eyes shut, hoping that Starsky would give up and think he was asleep.

The sex had began two months ago, exactly six months to the day after Starsky had been shot by James Gunther.  
It was his first day back at work and Hutch had arrived to collect him. He was nervous, as was Starsky. They both needed each other that day to just get through it. When Hutch arrived Starsky opened the door half asleep. "Hey buddy you forget what day it is?" Hutch smiled as he entered, just in time to see a young blond exiting Starsky's bedroom. "Ah Hutch…" stumbled Starsky as Hutch looked on in amazement, "This is…" He looked at the blond, "Kimberly" she responded, "Oh yeah" Starsky giggled, "Kimberly!"  
"Pleased to meet you" said Hutch, formally, and as soon as she had left he had pushed Starsky against the wall and devoured him. His hands wondered all over Starsky and both men could not get their clothes off quickly enough. They made love on Starsky's living room floor and afterwards Hutch cried.  
"Hey Hutch." Starsky soothed, "I…I never knew"  
"I never really knew either Starsky until that moment I saw Kimberly leave your room. I knew then that I never wanted anyone else to have you except me. Are you shocked?"  
"Hell yeah!" Responded Starsky, "But I'm not angry. In fact it was quite pleasant." He said mockingly.  
"Starsk'…"  
"Hey Hutch it's okay."  
"I didn't't hurt you?"  
"Hurt me! The size of your dick entering me and now you ask me if you hurt me. Of course you fucking hurt me. I thought you'd tear me apart. But fuck me Hutch, if that's what sex is meant to feel like then I've been missing out all these years. You should'a made me your bitch years ago!"  
"Starsky don't talk like that. It's not like that. I love you. I've always loved you. I just never realised that I loved you like that."  
Starsky smiled. He kissed Hutch on the tip of his nose, "I guess that means I love you too dummy"  
After that day the sex had become as frequent as it was urgent, as though both men were making up for all the lost years since discovering each other.

As Hutch lay in bed that morning with his lover, best friend and partner by his side he knew he would have to end it. He had long since known that he was bi-sexual and he missed women. He missed the curve of their breasts, the dark triangle between their legs that held so many pleasures. Their aroma, the warmth of their pussy. Starsky had the best arse Hutch had ever ridden, and there had been a few, although he had never told Starsky that, but he missed entering the moist, soft area that only a woman could have. He also suspected that Starsky wasn't gay. He knew Starsky loved him, but felt that his friend was going along with this because of that love. He knew Starsky must be missing women too, although they had never discussed it. Starsky was, after all, a ladies man. He never seem to go a night without some new hotty. Then there was the times that he could have married, Terri, Rosie. Hutch had been there once and once was enough. He thought he had come close with Gillian but a greater power had decided that it wasn't to be.

"Hutch are you avoiding me?" Starsky asked, his voice full of concern.  
Hutch rolled over. "Hey buddy" he smiled meekly. "You're awake early." He continued, ignoring Starsky's question.  
"Hutch you wanna make love?" Asked Starsky.  
"Making love, is that what you call this Starsk'?"  
Starsky was instantly confused. Last night he and Hutch had enjoyed a beer at Huggy's and were barely through the front door when they began tearing each other's clothes off. What had happened between then and now? Starsky decided to make a bigger effort to get Hutch aroused. He reached out and grabbed Hutch's dick. Hutch sat bold upright and jumped out of bed. It was as though Starsky's touch had sent an electric shock through his body. "Starsk' don't" he snapped.  
Starsky sat up. The sight of his naked partner making it harder for him to not grab him, pin him to the bed and fuck him like he'd never been fucked before. "Hutch what's wrong?" He asked, his voice betraying his inner thoughts.  
"Nothing Starsk' I just don't feel like it right now."  
Starsky raised his eyebrows, "You don't feel like it? Since when? Hutch for the past two months we've been fucking each other every single time we're alone, what do you mean you don't feel like it?" Starsky was angry. He was as horny as hell and this conversation was frustrating. He wanted to get on with the love making, not have a conversation about what he could see was just Hutch having a crisis of conscience.  
"Come on Hutch." He purred, trying to coax Hutch back into bed. A brick wall, a brick wall Starsky threw back the bed clothes so he was lying naked. He took his cock in his hand and began to caress it. Slowly at first but more urgently as his erection became solid. "You know you want to Hutch" he smirked invitingly. A brick wall, a brick wall Hutch's resolve was weakening. Starsky looked so damned good lying there. He had the best body Hutch had ever seen and when they snuggled together after sex, Hutch liked to bury his head in Starsky's chest hair. Although ninety percent of the time it was Hutch that entered Starsky it was still very clear that Starsky was all male. Shaking his head Hutch responded "Starsky I don't want this anymore. I don't want you."  
Starsky stopped masturbating. He sat up, suddenly realising that this was more serious than he had thought. "Hutch what happened?"  
"Nothing happened Starsky. This is isn't right. We can't do this anymore. I can't do this anymore." He corrected.  
"Can't do what anymore Hutch? What is it that isn't right?" Starsky asked, frightened, angry and confused. He knew he loved Hutch with all his being. He thought Hutch felt the same way. He thought Hutch would always feel the same way. "Don't you love me?" He asked, almost terrified to hear the answer.  
Hutch sat back on the bed, his back to Starsky. "Of course I love you dummy. I'll always love you. I think I always have. This isn't right though Starsk'. This isn't what you want. You need a wife, a home of your own, maybe a couple of kids too someday. We're not getting any younger and I can't be the one to deny you all that."  
Starsky spun Hutch round to face him. "When do you get to decide what it is I need?" He snapped. "I want you Hutch, every part of you. Your soul, your body, your mind, your love. That's what I want Hutch. The rest of it; it's a fantasy, stuff for fairy tales. This is the nearest we're going to get to Happy Ever After" he smiled.  
"But Starsk' you're not gay." Hutch responded.  
"How'd you work that one out partner?" Starsky laughed. "If you knew the thoughts that were going through my head, just seeing you sitting there naked, you wouldn't even make that statement, much less believe it."  
"But Starsk'" Starsky silenced Hutch with a kiss. He drew back and looked at his partner, Starsky was smiling. "Now say I'm not gay" he challenged. "Starsky I…." Hutch began, but Starsky silenced him again, his kiss more urgent this time. "Well?" Starsky asked.  
"Starsky I can't. I can't" Hutch put his head into his hands and cried. Starsky wrapped Hutch into his arms. _A brick wall, a brick wall_ Hutch could feel Starsky's erection pushing against his back. His resolve was weakening and yet he was determined that he had to do this for Starsky, for himself.  
"Hutch, come on babe, don't do this. It's okay. Whatever you think it is I want or need you're wrong. All I want is you babe. I'm sorry it took so long for me to realise it. I'm not going to lose you now. Not like this. We love each other. Everything else is just gravy. If you want to slow down, if you don't want to make love, that's okay. I can wait. I'll wait for as long as it takes Hutch. I love you. I don't wanna lose you." Starsky began to cry too. Despite wanting to reassure Hutch, he was terrified that this really was it and he knew he couldn't't bear it. "Hutch please"  
Hutch turned his face towards Starsky. "Are you sure? Really sure? If we do this Starsk' then it'll really just be me and thee. They'll be no-one else. This will be it"  
Starsky smiled "Me and Thee Hutch, just as it's always been"


End file.
